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Comfort & Joy
God had been silent for 400 years. 400 years. I feel isolated and dejected if haven’t encountered Him in a couple days, the very idea of silence for that length of time breaks my heart. For those who knew and waited, when they heard the stirrings that something was happening…can you even imagine what their hearts felt? And then, when it happened…when God’s own Son was born. The HOPE. The thrill of HOPE, the weary world REJOICES. Things we take so much for granted because we’ve always known those beautiful carols, the scriptures have been read to us since we could sit still. I find myself trying to explain this…
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The One About Grief
I don’t want to write about grief. I want to write about food and projects and books I’ve been reading. But, here I am. I was awoken from a deep sleep, and know that I have no hope of going back unless I express these thoughts and feelings. So, here I am, for better or worse, raw, vulnerable, and unfiltered. Frozen. That’s how I’ve felt for a while. Not fully feeling. Only doing what needs to be done, taking care of others, but unable to dip much into the creative current that usually lives right beneath my surface. Surface. That might be the key. Things on the surface are held…
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How’s She Doing? 5 Years Later, aka “No Really, I’m Good”…with asterisks
Five years ago this week was one of the longest weeks of my life. My diagnosis had been confirmed the week before, and we were trying to prepare for surgery the following week, but even that date was in the air. My children were in elementary school, and we were doing our best to give them safe answers when we didn’t know many answers, and keep them feeling safe when that definition was a bit wobbly for all of us. I was trying to focus on work enough to assure that things could run smoothly without me (*update, apparently they can 😉 iykyk). I was trying to process so much…
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My George
My daddy died last week. He was 91 years old, his body was tired, and his spirit was ready to be with Jesus. I can’t help but think of II Timothy 4:7, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” Even though I’ve known this was coming for a long time, it’s harder to let him go than I expected. He was 50 years old when I was born…I remember wondering when I was younger if he would be around for my wedding or to meet my children one day. He walked me down the aisle, helped me till my first garden…
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Cast Iron Magnolia…Kitchen
Hi everyone! If you have read much of this blog in the past, you know that I love to cook and bake, so I’ve decided to try a little something new and make a business of my baking. I’ll still use this site to blog recipes and thoughts and projects, but now you’ll also see a “Cast Iron Magnolia Kitchen” page that lists the products I’m currently baking. You can place an order directly in the website and I’ll contact you to determine when and where to meet up with the goods…OR, you can just shoot an email to castironmagnolia@gmail.com with an order, question, or special request. For now, I’ll…
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Full Circle
Three years ago today I received the call – the one that threw my family into a different orbit for some time to come. Lately, I’ve been pondering the last three years a good deal. I’ve noticed how much more “healed” I feel now. The Lord keeps impressing on me to notice these things…and to share them. So, today I share again. THREE has felt very significant lately. After some very quick research, I found that THREE represents wholeness, completion. I experienced a moment of wonder when I found this information. In this particular journey, it has taken three years to feel whole again. This wholeness isn’t something I’ve achieved…
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Madie’s Story
My baby girl turns 11 today. Time has a way of softening memories, so I’m writing the story surrounding her birth as a gift to her future self. Madie is my rainbow. That’s a phrase I’ve said to anyone who would listen many times over the years. I say it because her life reminds me that God keeps his promises. Ashley and I found out that we were expecting while traveling to a friend’s wedding rehearsal. We were talking about trying for another child soon, but this news was a surprise. I was so excited and at the same time very anxious as our son was born 6 weeks early,…
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Surviving
This morning as I drove my daughter downtown to Nutcracker practice, enthusiastically singing along to 70s dance hits, feeling carefree and happy, tears sprang to my eyes. This is what surviving looks like right now – deliciously, blissfully mundane and normal. Not a week goes by that I’m not hit with this same feeling of thankfulness – just insert a different scenario. The practice of referring to cancer patients as “survivors” has generally unsettled me, but I’ve never been able to put words to what bothered me about it. Lately, my thoughts have come together. I have realized that the label of “survivor” (noun) implies something that has already happened.…
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Showing Kindness
Today marks a year since my first chemotherapy treatment. A year since a very needy season of my life picked up steam. So, so much kindness was shown to my family. Over the months while I was receiving treatment, I jotted down some thoughts on how I could best love on others once I was able to shower the love on others instead of just receiving it myself. I’m going to share those thoughts plus some others with you in the hopes that they encourage you to extend kindness to someone who could use a little. Food – The need for food is universal, but tastes and household structure around food vary greatly.…
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One Year Later
Friday, November 4, 2016. One year ago. I received confirmation of the biopsy results that redirected my family’s time, resources, attention, and hearts for a while to come. We didn’t expect this, nor did we want it, but we managed through it. Some of you know that I really love a paper planner. But, what does a planner have to do with cancer? Nothing, I thought. But, now, just one of those little God details looking back that sends shivers up my spine. Last year I ordered a new brand of planner. This one allowed you to start on any month you choose, so I had it start in November because…
affectionately known as "Mama Devin" to some…
