Valleys and Change

Luke 12:25 tells us that worrying doesn’t add any time to our lives. Is it “natural” to worry? Yes. But, God is telling us right there not to worry.  When He gives us directions, He also gives us tools. This is for ALL of us – not just for those we look at as perfect Christians or for those who have hit rock bottom. ALL of us can ask HIM in the very moment of need. In this case, when the natural choice is to worry, ask for HIM to take that worry, ask HIM how to change your habit from worrying into living freely. 

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭12:25-26‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Why am I talking so much about worry today? Because we’ve had things happen this week that would “naturally” cause debilitating worry. I’ve gotten a lot of practice asking for His help. And, guess what? Yeah, you know the answer, He came through. Every single time.

To catch you up quickly, the first cycle of chemo has been completed. Mom got a short break, and then started Taxol (a chemo that is usually easier to handle). Taxol started off great and felt like getting out of the house more, but it (compounded with being worn down from the previous cycle of chemo) soon starting showing out, making Mom have severe stomach troubles that have kept her depleted. This week, she also started having “foot drop” which was very unexpected and I didn’t even know until she arrived in Jackson for chemo on Wednesday.

So, Wednesday. One look at Mom and I knew that the plan would have to change. It is so jolting to stop the momentum of a plan in action, isn’t it? But, cancer has a way of teaching us to do just that. Anyway, during her visit with her Nurse Practitioner and Doctor, it was decided that, #1 no chemo on Wednesday, #2 she would get an infusion of fluids on Wednesday, and #3 some tests needed to be run. Those tests included more blood work, an MRI, a CT and the dreaded Bone Scan (the words “Bone Scan” send fear down to my toes).

We waited for the complete metabolic profile results (the blood work) while she had the infusion of IV fluids at the clinic and rested. Results came back showing that her potassium was really low, so she needed to at least be admitted to get that corrected. All the other tests could be run while in the hospital. Even though this was such a change in plans, I breathed a sigh of relief that she could stay at Baptist and be cared for and watched over very carefully.

Adding a good complication to this was that Suzanne (my sister) was flying in to stay with Mom and Dad for two weeks. We had to do some quick regrouping to see who was going to go where and do what. So, our dear cousin Christy picked Suzanne up from the airport, brought her to the clinic to see Mama, then took Suzanne to Eupora to check in on Daddy with the plan for her to come back to Jackson on Thursday.

A hospital room was finally found in a very  full hospital, and we had to deal with some “fun” maneuvering to get her to where she needed to be. Along with this, Reese (my son) had his first church Bible Drill at 5:15 Wednesday – I just couldn’t miss it. So…my champion of a mother-in-law dropped everything and came to the hospital to help Mom get in her room and stayed with her until I got back from the church (and somewhere in there ran home to pack a bag). [Even during Bible Drill, Jesus spoke directly – one of the verses Reese was called on to recite was from the 23rd Psalm – what a comfort in the midst of the confusion.]

Once she was settled, she ate a good supper and rested comfortably. Until she was surprised at 9pm to go down for an MRI (surprised me too – I had just put on pj’s!). The MRI was uneventful, then back to room for the night. Nighttime was a typical night in the hospital – lab work or blood pressure or whatever about every two hours – but she rested well in between those things. Thursday she had a PT visit for the foot drop, went for the other scans and then a doppler. She was pooped, but the whole time, her potassium was infusing, so you could see her slowly perk up. Results started coming in here and there and nothing alarming came back. <praise> Suzanne came to the hospital around 5, and I left to go home and collapse.

So, today’s news. Since nothing alarming was found on her scans, and her tumor has visibly shrunk from the chemo she has already had, the new plan is to stop chemo and go ahead with surgery in a few weeks. I can tell you without hesitation that Sue is relieved 🙂 We all feel good about this decision.

It is so important to me to write about this journey so that this hard time in my mother’s life can be a testimony of God’s great power right in the midst of the storm – so, some of these thoughts have to be a little more raw and new to really communicate the wonder and awe of events as they are happening. I have so many more thoughts about the journey thus far, and many of them I’ll share later, after I’ve had time.

love to you all,
Devin